You Smile I Smile

You Smile I Smile
Sonshine: My Journey After the Loss of My Son

Saturday, April 13, 2013

Life Goes On

What an amazing month it has been. Two beautiful new babies came into the world, and another one celebrated his first birthday.

Baby Hadley Alexis Crist arrived first. She came into the world as a tiny little thing, only 4 pounds. Hadley is the daughter of Alexis and Jason Crist and the niece of Jeff Howard, my Andy’s dear friend. Sadly, Hadley’s mommy passed away due to complications during her birth. It was a devastating time, it was a joyous time. Hadley’s mom, Alexis, was a beautiful girl, with long, long, golden hair, pretty as a picture, only 24 years old. She was very excited to have her first baby. Only God knows why she had to pass on and leave a deeply grieving family and a beautiful baby without her mommy. It is very hard to accept, and my heart hurts very much for her loved ones. But one thing I know is that she is smiling down at her precious little baby with love and pride. And Hadley is so incredibly beautiful. I believe she has a very important purpose in this life, and she will bring so much love and joy to her adoring family. Welcome to the world, little Hadley!

Then I got to spend a whole week in Atlanta with my brother Jeff, his wife Kelley, and my adorable-beyond-belief nephew Sam. Sam turned one on April 6. It’s hard to believe a whole year has gone by. He is growing by leaps and bounds, and when it comes to precious, well, he wrote the book. Not to brag, but he is kind of a perfect little boy. He is a beautiful little thing with a sweet and happy personality. Just looking at him makes me happy. Oh, and he might be a baby genius too! I was so blessed to spend his first birthday with him. I wouldn’t have missed it for the world. The best part of my day was rocking him to sleep at night. Is there anything more precious than a sleeping baby? And feeling his tiny breath on my neck, I would think “this must be what heaven is like.” It brought back beautiful and happy memories for me. He so reminds me of Andy when he was that age.

And last but not least, my friend Rebecca and her husband Steve welcomed a beautiful new baby boy into their family on April 10. His name is Holden Hunt, and he is perfectly adorable. I got to hold him at the hospital today. Even though he weighed in at 9 lbs. 1 oz., he felt light as a feather after carrying Sam all week! Did I mention how much I love holding babies? Holden has two adorable older sisters who I know will dote on him and give him lots of sisterly love.  Lucky baby, he has two wonderful parents and two awesome sisters! I see a happy life ahead for the little guy.

Some might think that seeing other people with babies would make me sad, but nothing could be further from the truth. I celebrate each new life that comes into this world, and it brings me great joy to see people I love receiving such a precious gift. Life does indeed go on. Do I still miss Andy? More than life itself, but I have learned that he lives on in a wonderful way, and I see a glimpse of his spirit in each new life that comes into the world. So I celebrate these 3 special babies this month with great love and gratitude.

1 comment:

  1. Pam,
    I understand ! I am not saddened by seeing newborn babies. Just for a moment, I recall very vividly those first moments with Daniel, his knowing little face, and his warm cuddly body which so easily would cling to my own. How could I begrudge anyone of Earth from knowing such enduring joy ?
    I am happy for your friends and I will pray for the baby of the young woman who went home before she could raise him here on Earth. The occasional loss of a new mother still happens, and is heartbreaking. I will need to be medicated when my daughter some day has her own baby. Love to you my friend, and Andy, wherever you are, your Mom is still as remarkable as you remember!